On circles
Happy Friday, beautiful people. When I glanced at the calendar and saw that it was 3/14, my nerdy brain immediately remembered it is “Pi Day” (π being the irrational, transcendental number that is used in many geometric equations and begins 3.14). Since circles are one of the things we measure using pi, I was further tickled to realize that in the wee hours of today the United States experienced a total lunar eclipse on a full - perfectly circular - moon.
While I walked today, I thought about circles. How sometimes it can feel like our life is going in a circle - and not in a good way. I remember being in a place in my life where I felt like that and I found a perspective shift that helped me. When viewed from above, what looks like a circle can actually be a spiral. You may feel you are making not progress, but when you change your perspective, you realize that while you may still be trying and failing on the same lessons, you have actually ascended up.
This reminded me of a little piece I wrote when I was back in college; I’ve continued to edit over the last few decades, and this felt like a good time to share the most recent draft.
Is there an area in your life that you feel you have circled back around to many times? Can you practice kindness towards yourself and see that you have actually made progress?
Cal and Li sat at the local pizzeria, enjoying their weekly lunch together. After cutting his pizza into bite-sized pieces, Cal triumphantly announced that he had figured out his life earlier that day while soaking in the bathtub. Li scoffed at his proclamation and continued gobbling her slice of veggie deluxe. She gesticulated wildly, fingers greasy and splattered with sauce.
How can you claim such a thing? Life is endlessly imbued with meaning. You can’t “figure out” your life. It demands constant reading and rereading.
Cal blinked calmly behind his spectacles and, after finishing his twenty-sixth chew, swallowed a bite of his cheese pizza.
On the contrary, my dear. One can figure out one’s life. For example, I realized that the progression of my life is modeled after the parametric equations x = Asin(at), y = Bcos(bt), z = Ct. An ascending spiral. He paused to wipe a string of cheese from Li’s nose, and she batted his hand away.
You would believe such a thing, she spat, rolling her eyes. You probably take comfort in it, too; in believing that you’re in control. That you have the solution.
Cal shook his head and smiled. I would never presume to be fully in control. If x is happiness, y is health, and z is wealth; if A/a is experience, B/b is belief, and C is failure, then… He stopped.
Li started confusedly. Then what?
He simply replied, Then the only guaranteed variable is t, time.
Li gaped, So? “Time and tide wait for no man,” “Time heals all wounds” - what would you have me believe about time?
Cal lifted his hands in gentle surrender, Only that it is an inescapable constant.
